Welcoming Fall

Our Nights Are Now Longer Than Our Days

 

It’s now time for hoodies and bonfires for fall has arrived. Hikes and bike rides are in order. Many city folk sit excitedly awaiting Lady fall to change her wardrobe from the velvet greens to the brilliant dress of rusty reds, warm yellows and pumpkin orange. The time for star gazing while wrapped in a blanket with your special someone. A time to set artist alight with the fire of inspiration. Yes it all leads to the peaceful slumber of winter. Perhaps that’s why night capture’s the skies earlier, to allow for the sweet dreams of all to feed the trees for another brilliant spring and summer. So it a see you soon summer and I look forward to seeing you again next year.

 

A Loves Longing

 

The golden road lay before me, the crunching of the fallen leaves breaking our silence. His hand was warm and clammy I felt the fall of emotions almost holding my breath against the inevitable. Nothing but sadness filling me for although what we had shared was sweet I knew I was to kiss him goodbye. His golden skin and warm laughter were soon to be only a memory, the heat of our passion and sweet blooms of love would soon drop away as the leaves of the trees surrounding us. For now was the time of Fall and his time has passed. Summer held on to my hand as he smiled kissing the mountains with his warm glow. I felt the heat of his lips one last time as he whispered he would see me again. In my sadness and yearning for his arms I have painted the hills and mountains with my rich feelings. As I feel the cool callings from Winter. An endless dance of change has captured me I await my next turn with my beloved Summer. But now we must part but for a while, soon once again I will feel Summer’s warmth about me and hear his gentle whispers. But for now I am captured by the enticing night of Winter’s calling. I dance about inflaming the world with my passion and yearning for him.  But without this pain and longing my beauty would not be supreme. So I will soon sleep in a deep slumber enraptured in dreams of you my dear Summer our nights are now longer than our days as I await your embrace.

For Whom the Bell Tolls

The Bell Tolls

 

Another loud chiming announces the birth of yet another happy couple their lives intertwined in one way or another. The happy faces and joyful voices polluting the sullen air surrounding me. I had been there I had done that. I let the smooth cloud of smoke escape from my lips as I discard the butt of cigarette. A woman waved her hand about her in displeasure at the offending smoke I snickered and let loose my most gracious “kiss it “ smile and slinked pass her. She gapped at my back. I lived for moments like that, no doubt in the few seconds of seeing me she had decided my character but to be fair I had done the same. I watched as the limousine pulled away remembering when I myself had been chauffeured away to the supposed blissed state of marriage. I laughed at the ridicules show of it all. The bride had worn white and played the part of the angel. Ha! I scuffed my way towards the reception again sucking on my cancer stick enjoying the lustful eyes following me. Reveling in the reproving glares stabbing at me. I blame no one being for my condition I am the way I am mainly because I like the way I am. I had spent years living for others or doing what was expected, and what had it gotten me? Nothing but a divorce, alimony bills and a negative outlook on others. I had always been inclined to such outlooks but society doesn’t enjoy the negative Nancy’s. Once I had been screwed over by my wife I saw no need to try and hide the real me it had not made her happy nor myself. So now I lived for myself I was comfortable with the fact that I enjoyed making people wriggle with discomfort. I loved being able to discern actions and motives. I watched as I caught the eye of one of my friend and he sauntered over bringing behind him a trail of kittens. He was a polar opposite of me but I appreciated his own unique qualities. He and I were friends of the groom. I toyed with a brunette standing closest to me. When I felt a hand grab my shoulder and then the man himself spoke “Ladies I suggest you not get your hopes up with this one” he said as he grip tightened “He’s a Wiley one, he would sooner rip you heart out than let you in” they giggled not believing him I disengaged from the group feeling my agitation grow I pulled out another cigarette and lit up he frowned as I blew smoke out my nostrils.

“How can I help you?” I asked as he looked down and said “I just to make sure that we are cool?”

“Is this you asking or your wife insisting?”

 “Me, you have always been a good friend.”

 “Yeah so we have been, Yes I’m cool with this all,” I said waving my hand about me “what’s there to not be cool with?” he sighed as if relieved he spoke on a few more things and then was pulled away by the blushing bride. I laughed aloud as I watched them cuddle before all as if thrusting their supposed love in everyone’s face demanding acknowledgement. I left the party and walked down the street only to hear my name called I stopped and waited as the swishing of a gown approached “ Jared tells me that you’re not mad at us, is it true?”

“If it wasn’t would I have said it?”

 “No I suppose you wouldn’t have, did you attend the ceremony?”

 “Of course that’s the whole point of this shin-dig isn’t it? “Nothing her voice seemed stuck in her throat. “I’m happy now and I can tell you are to” I spun around to face my ex-wife now standing before me again garbed in white and joyful “would it matter if I was happy or not?, would it have stopped you? You think I’m happy?” I shook my head and walked away to only hear her stamp her feet and say in the whinny  voice that grated on my ears  “You told Jared you were fine with us” I stopped looking back into her clear blue eyes  “ I said I was fine with him I never said I was fine with you,”

“Why not? “

“Rebecca what will you gain if I am okay with you some, maybe some of that guilt might be alleviated is that what you want? Well don’t hold your breath sweetie I raised a son for two years thinking he was mine only to find out that he’s actually Jared’s and that only happens after I find you and he naked in our bed. I could expect as much from Jared he’s always been an ass but you, Ha I was blinded by that pretty face and what’s worse is I’m still paying for it, when it’s you who screwed me over, no you and I we will never be okay I just wanted to make sure you were actually going to be gone from my life.”

 I turned and walked down the dark street as she called out my name I ignored her she was my past. Screw society’s rules I wouldn’t ever allow expectation and conventionality to rule my life again. I lit another cigarette thinking on who to screw with next, it was Saturday night endless possibilities lay before me in the twinkling horizon. Happy endings, who needs them I just need a reality.

Skip a Few

So another week has passed and I am dry..... My brain is crying I have been revising a book draft and as thus I can not produce my beautiful flowing words this week. Please Forgive me!
Nicky Ehrens

Good Morning Waffles

Waffles

 

Another morning has greeted all who breathe its September 9, 2013 in a few days the United States will once again morn those lost in the twin towers. I was only eleven on that morning, death was something hard for me to comprehend the fact that all these people had woken up and ate breakfast kissed their wives, moms, dads, kids and then left for a simple job never to return again was something I could not fathom. To this day it disturbs me. As I sit watching 60 Min. Report about the museum nearly finished and the fact that anyone under seventeen will need to learn for they did not live it surprises me. What had been an event of catastrophe and had touched just the fringes of my own family. These children only knew as history.

As I sit pondering these things I am moved with sadness as I watch my aging grandmother (who has cared for me since birth) serve me waffles something enveloped in memories. I personally hate waffles but I choke them down because she has been making these since I was a child. We discuss my friends upcoming marriage and then on to my thoughts on the curse. All the little things that consist of a breakfast. Soon though I know that these breakfast will be no more. Someday in the future I will have to make my own waffles talk to myself for comfort. I feel despair grab me I am not crying for myself but for the ones who have lost all their loved ones. The ones who kissed them goodbye watched as they left calling out “be safe”. Only to know that those were words, horrible words that failed their loved one were gone like a wind gust here one moment gone the next leaving behind only the scattered leaves of the trees it blew by. I am not just referring to the events on that terrible day I speak of every day. Everyday lives have ended. As I watch the syrup drip from the piece of waffle held just before my mouth I laugh at nothing in particular but just for the sake of laughing.

 

Watching the sun rise with the one I love is the fondest memory I hold it close for it was one of the last. His heart stopped beating not three hours ago he knew he would die. We all know we will die but he had an expiration date stamped on his hand. Kisses and hugs the only way to comfort our crying hearts. I think the sunset we watched together was his way of saying goodbye for he made me stay and hold his hand. Then pulling me close in a lovers embrace as tears began to fall he said “If the sun didn’t set to end the day you would never be able to welcome a new day full of hopes and dreams.” The tears I cry now will one day be cried for happy occasions but right now it’s a testament to you my love. A testament to the never ending sea of love that you have given me, I kiss his forehead on last time and walk out of the hospital, right now is my night but I look forward to the dawn he promised.

So in conclusion appreciate the ones you have now and miss the ones you lost.  

Rainy Day's

It’s a Rainy Day

 

On rainy days I often find myself at a loss as to what I should do. The rain drizzles down leaving puddles beneath my window the air becomes sticky with heated breathe, hair becomes limp or frizzy faces become oily and dirt is prevalent. A good day to read? Yes, A good day to sleep? Yes, a good day to make mud pies for nostalgic memories? Unfortunately Yes. Maybe it’s because I have read one to many books or the fact that I allow my mind to drift on rainy days I find it hard to pin down my thoughts it makes me think of mystical things like, A witches swamp or maybe sleepy hollow. Yes on such days as this I have come up with many a horrific or funny tale.

 As I continue to stare out the window as raindrops ripple the pool of water caught beneath a clogged gutter. I can only feel reminiscent of the first time we met. It was much like this day I was jogging along the winding trail in a park when a fallen leaf captured my foot's attention sending my skidding down a muddy embankment. I was nasty and bleeding because of the brambles that had ripped at my clothes you were crisp and clean as you lifted me from the embankment your heartbeat steady skin warm and voice deep. A raindrop awoke me from the waning blackness. As I was laid on the ambulance gurney and whisked away I couldn’t help but remember your violet eyes and dark hair. Had I dreamt it? Surely no one real could ever possess such beautiful strange eyes. After the bump on my head and sprain in my ankle healed I was back to my jogging still unsure of reality and dream. Each day though I found at the top of a hill stood a majestic wolf like dog with icy eyes always following me as if watching over me. I soon tired of being its soul view but no matter where I decided to run the wolf would always be there. On another rainy day I decided to end the strange dog sighting and would simply not go to my regular park and would instead hike a trail near my home. I walked the drizzle only slight enough to make me uncomfortable but not enough to end my work out.  As I hiked on I tired finding that it was time for my descent back into the bustling society bellow the mountain I had attempted to climb. But the night had caught me by surprise and so too did the weather, as the shadows made unsure of my footing  I soon found myself stepping into hole of some sort and toppling down a hill. I was awash in pain the world before me blotching with a deep blackness my head swam in exhaustion I felt the whole of my situation and I had no hope I had been stupid , I had forgone safety and now I would pay the price. Tears had streaked my face as I tried to move the cold and wet had saturated my clothes. I knew that death had caught my number and he wouldn’t let go. I heard the cracking of limbs and heavy breathing. Just above out of my reach I saw to icy blue eyes staring down at me. My breathe caught fear struck me, but instead of the mauling I was suspecting I heard whimpering and then he was gone. I cried all this trouble and I still had not lost my pursuer. What an idiot I am. I closed my eyes and soon fell into a deep sleep. I began to feel pricks of heat and soft brushes to my face. Alarmed I opened my eyes to find myself encircled by a man’s arms. The warmth was my feet being warmed a heated blanket I looked up my body stiff with pain Violet eyes stared back at me. A whimper came from the bed side there sat the wolf his icy eyes staring in what seemed worry. The man spoke his deep voice vibrating into my shoulder which was leaned up against his chest.  “His name is Nuka.”  “Nuka… Is he yours?” “I guess you could say that, I make sure he stays alive.” “Who are you?” he said nothing. My heart beginning to flutter with fear “Who are you? And where am I ?” still nothing as I tried to escape his grasp he tightened pulling me closer  and quietly he whispered into my ear “  I am going to be the owner of your heart…. Because you are the owner of mine and as to where you are, you are in my home.” “What “He covered my mouth with his own spreading to me a deep soul warming kiss.  I smiled as I watched the road before me as Nuka and the man I had come to know and love as Kendrick came holding the hand of our little violet eyed son. Rain is my favorite memory those clouds always bring new joys on the horizon. Always allowing mystical things to stay as reality.